If I Only Had A Brain
by T Bond aka tbondrage99
Summary: One Shot. Ok This is an old one that I'm re-posting. Staring Al Snow, Steve Austin, & Spike Dudely. Please Read & Review


DISCLAIMER: I DONT OWN THE WWF OR THE WIZARD OF OZ OR ANYTHING RELATED TO EITHER OF THEM....I just felt the sudden need to write a song fic for some reason....its my first so I hope you like it.....  
  
NOTE #1: Ok This is a re-posting that I had upa few years ago, and after looking it over I decided to post it again cause I like it lots!  
  
NOTE #2: I Wrote this just before writing Wrestling With The Wizard Of Oz  
  
NOTE #3: This takes place....umm...a while after WrestleMania 17....  
  
Al Snow sat in his locker room thinking about what everyone always say when they dont think he can hear them. But he does. He did have a brain. Or at least he thaught so....wait if he thaught then of corse he had a brain....right? Al decided to address this & left his locker room & went to the ring & grabbed a mic to speak in front of the live crowd attending Raw Is War & the Millions of people watching at home.   
  
"It has come to my that people are always making fun of me saying Im stupid & I have no brain. Well I would like to address that tonight....with a song. Here goes." Al looked around at the fans some cheering some confused & some covering there ears for the song that would come. Al took a deep breath & started to sing.  
  
"I could while away the hours conferrin' with the flowers Consultin' with the rain. And my head I'd be scratchin while my thoughts were busy hatchin If I only had a brain.I'd unravel every riddle for any individ'le . In trouble or in pain.With the thoughts you'll be thinkin' you could be another Lincoln If you only had a brain. Oh I could tell you why the oceans near the shore.I could think of things I never thunk before.And then I'd sit and think some more. I would not be just a nothin' my head all full ofstuffin'. My heart all full of pain.I would dance and be merry life would be a ding-a-derry if I only had a brain." After he finished his song the fans were cheering.   
  
"Thank you all so much you have no idea how much your cheers mean to me...Im going back to High school to get my diploma!" Al left the ring with the fans cheering even more. Little did Al know they cheered at the end of his song because it was finally over & cheering about the whole diploma thing cause he wouldbe gone for a while.   
  
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"Darn it Steve! I dont even know you now that you have become a friend of Vicne McMahon! Its like you dont even have a heart anymore!" Debra yelled at her husband before leaving there locker room. Steve sat alone think it over for a few seconds then started totalk to himself.  
  
"What does she mean if I only had a heart? I have a heart bigger then anyones!" Steve looked around the empty locker room trying to figure out who he was trying to fool befrore break out in song.   
  
"When a man's an empty kettle he should be on hismettleAnd yet I'm torn apart Just because I'm presumin' that I could bekind-a-humanIf I only had heart I'd be tender I'd be gentle and awful sentimentalRegarding Love and Art I'd be friends with the sparrows ... and the boys whoshoots the arrows If I only had a heartPicture me - a balcony. Above a voice sings low Wherefore art thou Romeo?I hear a beat...how sweet Just to register emotion jealousy devotionAnd really feel the part I could stay young and chipper and I'd lock it with a zipper If I only had a heart." Steve stop after just hearing himself. "You know what from now on Im gonna be a nice guy again....until Vince give me another offer...."  
  
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Spike sat beside Molly pondering on if he should tell her he loved her. He wanted to but what if she didnt say it back then he would of just made a fool of himself. Suddenly Spike jumped up in front & started to sing to Molly.  
  
"Yeah it's sad believe me Missy When you're born to bea sissy Without the vim and verve.But I could show my prowess be a lion not a mouess If I only had the nerve.I'm afraid theres no denyin' I'm just a Dandy Lion A fate I don't deserve.I'd be brave as a blizzard....I'd be gentle as a lizard.... I'd be clever as a gizzard....If the Wizard is a Wizard who will serve. Then I'm sure to get the Nerve!" Spike realised what he had just done & sat down again blushing.   
  
"Whats all that about Spike?" Molly asked.   
  
"Well Molly....I guess...well...I love you." Spike looked up at Molly. Her face brightened with a smile.  
  
"I love you to Spike." At that point it was Spike smiling & wondering if he could ever find the nerve to ask Molly to marry him when the time came.  
  
THE END.  
  
There you go. If you want more zanyness like this then I highly recommed Wrestling With The Wizard Of Oz, it has all the same characthers so yeah...goog stuff, anyways please review.  
  
LaTerZ  
  
-T Bond 


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